Zen or Phobic?

Bagit Before the Meltdown

Remember the new guy we found sitting alone amongst the books in the coffee shop the other day?  You'll never believe it.  After we poured a couple of shots of expresso for him and gave him a chocolate muffin he seemed a little wired and ready to talk. He was mumbling at first and hard to understand but the more I listened the more I was drawn in.  He seemed familiar, yet I was very sure I'd never seen him before.  I thought he had been meditating when we first met, but when he started talking about molecular meltdowns and thermal reconstruction I had to reconfigure my initial impression from that of zen master to perhaps a chemistry student drop-out.  In fact as it turned out, he had been reconfigured himself.  One could say he had been reconstituted, recoloured, reconstructed  - but certainly not fully recovered.  He was a nervous little fellow with very good reason to be.  This guy had been one of the most successful Castaway Characters of all, but now is almost down and out, nervous and not just a little strange.  You'd be strange too if you'd been treated as he has.  Yes, this is / was Bagit the author of Super-Hero Super-Villain! 



Bagit After the Meltdown

Bagit told us how one night while asleep in his office he was jumped from behind, had a bag pulled over his head and was dumped into a large bin.  Later people came and took him to a warehouse, tortured him until he couldn't remember who he was and he passed out.  When he woke up he was on a shelf in a shop, a different shape, a different colour, in fact a different being altogether.  Surprisingly, in that state he was able to break free from his wrapping and found his way here, where we found him lost and confused.  What an ordeal! I'm not surprised we haven't heard anything from him for a while.  He just looks so different!

I'd never thought about recycling being a particularly bad thing before, but from the Castaway Characters perspective being suddenly melted down, remoulded and reborn must be a particular cause for alarm.  After the meltdown that Bagit described, I think we must assume that he is suffering from Distressed Plastic Syndrome at the very least.  His agent told us that he'd had plastic surgery, but that kind of positive spin is what you'd expect from an agent, I suppose. Don't worry we'll take care of him, but don't expect too much from the new Bagit just yet.